I have my class schedule for the spring semester. The courses have been paid for already. I need to get my books sometime before the 12th of Jan. I almost feel slightly accomplished.

I keep trying but no end is near. I hate having to take pills to go to sleep, you never know when your going to wake up. I am here litless and utter in contempt. No rest for the wicked I guess.

Quite frankly I cannot express in words the urges and annoyances I have to deal with on a daily basis, guilt kept me here for longer than I wanted and no I am paying for it in more than a few ways. I will move out as soon as It is humanly possible for me too. I can not continue like this.

I could list all the things that have gone wrong within the past week, but that would not change a single thing.
I am frail. I am going about my day the best I can.

a note on this week

history was made. Honestly everyday will become history the next. I am struggling with sleep. Bitterly fighting with it for rest. I looked in the mirror this morning and I look like a corpse.